Bachelor Pad recap: Season 1, episode 4 (8/30/2010)
This is what happens when people stop being polite, and start getting real.
It’s week 4 of Bachelor Pad, and you can leave your giddy at the front door, because playtime is OVER. With all the happiness sucked out of the place, our favorite knockoffs proceeded to screw their way into the finals harder than ever. Wes is on the warpath after those bastards dared to send his Gia home, and this week’s challenge was no laughing matter either: the contestants won by guessing on some of the most offensive personal topics, such as who has the worst boob job (Elizabeth), who was the dumbest (Gwen), and who was the least likely to actually get married (Natalie). It was so bad that after the questions were over, almost EVERY GIRL CRIED.
Geez, talk about getting real. Which is why this week’s Power Rankings are all about which contestants pulled no punches and totally went there. Bring it? Oh, it’s already been brought!
Power Rankings
6. Kovacs
Kovacs is worth mentioning only because of the fact that he was completely UNREAL and gave up winning the challenge in order to save Elizabeth’s hurt feelings. Didn’t work anyway, as she cried herself crazy in the bathroom, but at least it wasn’t his doing. Kudos for getting the girl, but did you forget that SHE IS NUTS?!
5. Tenley
I think I love Tenley, though I’d much appreciate if she didn’t act so clueless towards the house, and especially towards Kiptyn. I’ll give it to her though- her one-on-one date for winning the challenge was perfectly romantic, and it’s nice to see her finally happy. You know, not crying in the bathroom. Or in someone’s arms. Or anywhere there’s a camera.
4. Natalie
For choosing herself as the dumbest girl in the house, thinking that she was right (an overwhelming number of people agreed with her), and then realizing that the majority of the house didn’t think she was dumb, after all. Whoops!
3. Wes
It didn’t help his case, but at least the guy was completely honest about calling out the alliances in the game. Though he totally cowered up as soon as David Good barked back and called him a jackass. He was even voted biggest jerk in the house. And somehow was surprised. You mean to tell me that there’s a place where you can threaten everyone around you and not be considered a Grade A toolbag? Where’s that at?
2. Jesse Beck
Your favorite Bachelor homeboy (okay, maybe just mine) not only won the challenge by having the balls to call out Elizabeth’s bad boob job (Lame move, Kovacs!), but chose Natalie for his one-on-one date… then proceeded to act a dang fool. In what was the most entertainingly awkward date on Bachelor Pad record, the dude proceeded to get drunk, burp in Peyton’s face, and completely turn her off to liking him. Oh, you fancy, huh?
1. Krisily
Now let me first start by saying that I don’t like giving away who goes home in the rankings, but this girl was just too badass to pass up. Forget the first 119 minutes where all she does is talk about how she lurrrrves David Good, it’s all about the seconds after she gets eliminated. She immediately bursts into a brilliant kiss-off speech, calling everyone out, and says that Kiptyn, Tenley, Kovacs, and Elizabeth all unfairly have the final four spots in the bag. She said her piece, bid everyone good day, and didn’t have to pull out anyone’s tracks (though that would have been awesome) or slap a hoe- though everybody looked like they had just gotten punched in the face when she was through with them. Awkward turtle!
So who went home?
Ding dong! Krisily is dead! FINALLY, I couldn’t stand her. On the guys’ side, Wes’ scheming failed for the second week in a row, and it was his own butt that was forced to hit the door.
Notes and Quotes
- I don’t know how Wes thought he was safe this week… I’m sorry, did you not know everyone thinks you’re a total douche? Deuces.
- Kris and Wes weren’t wrong- Tenley and Elizabeth with Kiptyn and Kovacs have a significant amount of power in this game. How does David Good think that he’s going to stay in the game as a part of the Kip-Kovacs-Dave alliance if Jesse Beck wins the next challenge?
- Next week the girls start dropping like flies (FINALLY). I’m calling Tenley, Elizabeth, Peyton, and Natalie as the Top 4 women standing.
- I miss the Weatherman. No one is nearly as hilarious as he was.
- Who is Gwen?
- I just don’t buy that any relationship on the show is real. Elizabeth is too wacko, Tenley is too naïve, and Kip and Kovacs are just too whipped and desperate. They know that if they hurt these girls, they’re gone.
- Quote of the night was definitely Jesse Beck’s burp on his date with Peyton. How delightful.
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Terron Moore occasionally likes flailing around to Justin Bieber music. He also thinks you're awesome.
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