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The Five Best Euro Zone Conspiracy Theories, Page Two

Joe Hines

Previous: Merkel Planned This All Along

3. Mitt Romney wins election

Embarrassed by stories about magic underwear, Mitt Romney cannily changes the topic; crashes the global economy. All pundits suggest that a global economic collapse would reflect poorly on President Obama. So, why not? Okay, so there’s no evidence linking Mitt Romney to the Greeks or the Spanish anti-austerity activists. In fact, they share very little ideological common ground.

|  Related: Democrats To Republicans: "No, YOU'RE European!"  |

But you just wait. If this thing goes sour before November, Romney’s going to need an alibi. 

4. Is Ron Paul trying to get us back on the Gold Standard?

Austerity now, austerity forever! Would you put it past Ron Paul to start a financial crisis for political gain?

One of Ron Paul’s principle beliefs is that the global economy is predicated on fabricated certainty and faulty ideology. Paul’s ideas were ascendant after the 2008 crisis, and they would be on the rise again in the event of another global fiscal meltdown. Were the euro to end, Paul would look like a prophet, even if he’s just a crank. 

This weekend, Ron Paul supporters continued to systematically steal delegates from other candidates in the hopes of influencing the Republican Party position at the convention. Paul’s not past trying to influence the world economy through subterfuge.

There’s nothing Ron Paul supporters like more than a good conspiracy theory. Here’s one for them: Who’s to say that Ron Paul supporters aren’t secretly pushing for the end of the euro?  After all, there’s nothing that would challenge the current financial order quite like economic chaos. Who’s got the most to gain from a Greek exit? Ron Paul.

5. Obama’s bored of talking about mild recovery, prefers deep depression

If the economy collapses again Obama gets to be FDR. Or more likely, Hoover. Is the tea party even still around?

 

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Follow on Ology: Joe Hines |  PoliticOlogy

Follow on Twitter:@JPHines90 |  @OlogyPolitics

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