We're quitting the weekly recaps of Comedy Central's Workaholics: it's been 2 seasons, bros, what else is there to say about the funniest show on television? Instead, click here every week for the best quotes from each episode—let's face it, it's really why you're here. So let's reminisce on the brilliance of "Fat Cuz", which has quite a few shocking revelations for Adam. One, he has a fat cuz. Two, he probably has herpes.
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- “Give parking spot to idiots. Change tampon. Kill self.”
- “WE ARE DEFINITELY GONNA HAVE OUR CATS F*CK.”
- “You’re gonna bust a nut, man. And I’m not talking about the good kind.”
- “Unfortunately, Ders’ micro-machine penis doesn’t classify him as handicapped. It should, though.”
- “Just throw it away, man, pretend like you never got it. That’s what I do with my STD test.”
- “I’m gonna rip your tits off and use ‘em as cereal bowls!”
- “I wish someone told me I was working on Sad-urday!”
- “I was wrong about you. You’re not gay at all. You’re probably bi, though.”
- “I wish I was handicapped. Those guys are so lucky, dude.”
- “I am not footing the bill so you can masturbate your life away!”
- “I can tell you it’s bigger than a cat’s dick.”
- “Here lies Ders, TelAmeri-dork. Father of two broke gays.”
- “It feels like a real woman’s boob!”
- “Homeless people wipe their hands off in my hair.”
- “Regular people can’t even park! It’s all mutant parking!”
- “You’re like Rick Ross with extra sauce.”
- “Gay dudes: always worried about time!”
- “Ballin’ off government checks like Obama Bin Laden!”
- “You should come over and breed.”
- “We’re all a little worked up. Probably from that fart!”
- “Who needs a leg when all you wanna do is eat Doritos and watch Brazzers all day?!”
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