We've all taken a trip on the magic bus to freedom land. If you haven't done LSD, I don't recommend you do because drugs are very bad. Plus, you think you're going to have a good time in Central Park and then OH MY GOD THE TREES ARE BREATHING AND ANGRY THAT WE'VE DESTROYED THEIR HABITAT.
This enjoyable (read: horrifically strange) news comes from Florida (where else?) where a naked guy tripped some heavy f*cking shit and then ate some dude's face off. Turns out, that's in the extended cut of Mad Men's "Far Away Places."
If you don't want to know the gorey details, I suggest you stop reading. Or stare at this for a while.
Anyway, the Miami Herald reports:
"The man he attacked remained in extremely critical condition Sunday night at Jackson Memorial Hospital. Much of his face was gone, the skin ripped away, the nose bitten and the eyes gouged."
To be fair, the LSD did make it look like his face was some really good bibimbap (Korean, look it up, it's delicious).
But oh wait, there's more:
"One witness said he was riding his bicycle on the MacArthur when he saw a man tearing off pieces of the victim’s flesh with his mouth. After an officer approached, Larry Vega, 'The guy just stood, his head up like that, with pieces of flesh in his mouth. And he growled.'"
WHOA HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS.
Now I know everyone is hoping on the zombie train, but have you considered werewolves? Zombies don't growl, you leptons. I know because I've been catching up on True Blood therefore I'm a authority on sexy naked supernatural beings.
The "macabre" (understatement) story ended with the police shooting the potential werewolf, and the victim in the hospital in critical condition. Apparently the only thing that remained on his face was his goatee.
Happy summer everyone!
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[Naked man who tried to rip the flesh off another man on MacArthur Causeway identified Read more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/28/2821404/naked-man-who-tried-to-rip-the.html#storylink=cpy]
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