Hopefully tonight I can keep who's who straight. We'll see. For those just tuning in, this show is basically Top Chef meets Amazing Race. Ready? OK. Let's do this.
The chefs head to France and since Chaz won, he gets to pick his new team. He picks Gary and a bunch of other people I forget (give me a break, there's like a million of them). Gary is bragging about how he was a French interpreter and stuff, which already makes me think he's going home. Bravo and their editing. You never know.
"Is your gaydar going off?"
That Sai chick won't stop talking about herself and the cute guy John makes fun of her. When in Lyon, they have to run around the city completing different tasks. That Keven weirdo is overly confident. About everything.
"Jenna's leading the way because civilians can read maps too."
Shutup, Sai. You got them lost last week. The black team (the better team) misses their exit, so the red team gets there first. When they arrive, they have to guess which cheese is made from sheep. There are 30 different cheeses. Jenna and John aren't doing so well.
"Nobody fucking cares about your cheese knowledge."
The black team arrives and Keven is convinced he's a cheese man. The red team finally gets it right while the black team is still having problems with Keven and Nookie. They actually get it pretty quickly once Nookie steps in.
"I love your cheese, dude!"
For the next step, they have to herd sheep. You know, because that has everything to do with cooking. Jenna, again, tries to be the leader.
"Guys, think about Moses!"
The black team gets three sheep in, but then Keven lets them go because he's just stupid.
"Gary thought if he speak to them in French, that might help."
Apparently, it does. The sheep start moving. They finish first despite showing up after the red team. Then they head to a red barge with hottie Curtis Stone waiting for them (his only job is to look pretty, right?). The teams must pair eight wines with the ingredients they are made of.
"Keven jumps in because he's apparently a sommelier along with being a cheese monger."
Nookie actually steps up and helps the goofball out. Black team wins just as the red team runs up. The exceptional ingredient is a master class with some famous French chef (guys, I'm sorry, too much going on to get names). When they get into the restaurants, Jenna takes the front of the house for the red team and Gary takes on that role for the black team.
[insert lots of shots of them cooking in the kitchen]
"If we're on the losing team, I'm voting for Nicole. Chef 101, count your fucking fish."
The red team is a friggen mess and they didn't make the Quenelle correctly, but the judges (or hosts) still enjoyed it. Uh oh. The black team's Quenelle is very good, but Gary decides to serve all the dishes at once and the diners look confused.
Overall, it seems like it could be either team. But, the black team ends up winning and Avery (wait, who?) gets the MVP. Chaz is pisseddddd.
Meanwhile, the red team goes at it and it's clear either Sai or Nicole is going home. In the end, they choose Sai to go home because she made a salad. Honestly, I dislike her but Nicole should have probably left over her. These people are definitely more strategic than I thought they would be.
Whatever. On to Barcelona!
SumOlogy: Can't wait until there are like 6 people left and I can actually tell what's going on.
Grade: B-
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Follow Sharon Tharp on Twitter: @sharontharp
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