The 2012 Coachella Music Festival lineup made its way online yesterday and, like every year, we've already vowed to give up coffee, cigarettes, and impulsive record store visits between now and April in hopes of scraping enough spare change for a ticket. If you hadn't heard, the biggest (and usually best) American music festival is taking place over TWO weekends this year: April 13-15 and April 20-22. No idea which weekend will turn out to be the better of the two, but we do have a list of things that had damn well better happen at one or the other.
Peep the complete Coachella 2012 line-up right here and then check out our handy check-list of things we want to see go down:
Friday:
- During Pulp's set (their first American gig in 13 years, FYI), Jarvis Cocker re-enacts the lyrics to "I Spy" and "Live Bed Show" on stage with Cat Power and/or Hope Sandoval and a real bed.
- M83 and The Horrors get into back-stage fisticuffs over whose new music would've made a more effective alternate soundtrack to Pretty In Pink.
- Frank Ocean and Girls frontman Christopher Owens smoke so much weed, they decide to run off and form a Frank Zappa tribute band together.
- The Black Keys spend half of their headline set coming up with a better anti-Nickelback rant... one that can't be shot down with a simple "I know you are but what am I?" tweet.
Saturday:
- Martin Solveig performs Madonna's new album in its entirety... with St. Vincent on vocals.
- Jeff Mangum plays enough of Neutral Milk Hotel's In The Aeroplane Over The Sea for Noel Gallagher's big frustrated head to explode.
- The entire crowd takes one big nap during Bon Iver's set. (Extra bonus points if Childish Gambino wakes everybody up at the end.)
- Radiohead invite Andrew Bird onstage to whistle the entire "Paranoid Android" solo while Jonny Greenwood is busy asking Feist out on a tea date.
Sunday:
- The Weeknd's new backing band turns out to be... At The Drive-In.
- DJ Shadow takes Girl Talk aside and teaches him a thing or two about sampladelica. (Justice eavesdrop on this conversation from behind a smoke machine.)
- Florence Welch finally ends all the speculation by revealing that The Machine has been The Hives this whole time.
- Dr. Dre & Snoop Dogg remember to show up.
Which Coachella acts are you guys most excited to see this year? Hit up our comments section below and let us know.
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