Hollywood is all a buzz today with the news that Terrence Malick's new film Tree of Life starring Brad Pitt got totes boo'ed at the Cannes Film Festival.
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This morning critics from all over the world packed the 2,300 seat theater (ed note; a 2,300 seat theater? Sweet Jesus, that's excessive) to see the much anticipated new film. Tree of Life is all about a Texan family in the 1950s and the further implications on the complexities of human existence (DISMISSIVE WANK MOTION HERE).
Apparently the film is visually stunning and does an OK job on attempting to explain "what it all means" but people hated it. They straight up boo'ed when it ended. Then a few claps for Terrence Malick when his name flashed up on the credits. Malick who, by the way, wasn't even there.
Obviously in the following press conference, Pitt and the other producers emphasized that this wasn't going to be a big popcorn and raisonettes affair. It was a story (or perhaps true lack thereof) to try to create the feeling of existentialism that a great painting would. Or whatever.
Obviously I'm not in Cannes right now so I didn't get a chance to see this great/not-so-great film but I think I know the real reason why the film got boo'ed. It's because the screener was at 8:30 in the f*cking morning.
Seriously, who planned that? If you're going to show a film at 8:30am it better be a popcorn and raisinettes, people's heads getting chopped off, gratuitous sex scene movie. Like Game of Thrones or something. Don't put some great existentialist ejaculation up on a screen when the viewers haven't even recovered from their Champagne/Cannes induced hangover. It's just bad planning. Once I was covering some NYFF stuff and I had a screener for a three hour long cinema verite thing. With subtitles. The movie wasn't bad by any means but I will tell you that I may have falling asleep during it, like half of the critics sitting around me. I bet I know why Malick wasn't there. Because he was sleeping. Like a normal person. When was the last time you woke up before 8 to see a Brad Pitt movie? I think the answer is, "Never. Even in the 90s when he actually mattered."
Thus, I will take no more criticism of Tree of Life seriously until screeners start showing at a decent hour.
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[CANNES: Malick's 'The Tree Of Life' Finally Debuts - To Mixed Reaction Among Media ]
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