Sex, drugs, rock and roll... a better combination than PB&J or gingers and sunscreen. It makes perfect sense then that the following question would arise: What musicians do you want to party with? Imagine an epic bash--whether it's a rave or at a frat, there are some performers who would simply make the party... and some who would kill it. Here are my choices:
YES on the guest list: Peaches
This woman (she's 42 years old) brings the ultimate dirty sexy energy. The titles of her singles "I Feel Cream," "Wild Thing," and "Fuck the Pain Away" clearly convey that sex is pretty high on her priorities. Plus, given her strong stances on abolishing gender roles and traditional gender labels, she would probably make out (or more) with absolutely everyone in the room.
NO on the guest list: Ke$ha
Ke$ha is the girl who thinks she IS the party when in reality she's probably just the girl who arrives without her shirt, makes out with a 38-year-old douche bag, and then spends the rest of the night in a locked bathroom vomiting up Goldschlager. Yes, her songs make it clear she spends most of her time trying to find the next opportunity to get drunk and have sex, but I'm guessing the intercourse is so sloppy you'd regret it even as it was happening. Sorry, K$, I think our party's full (of girls who actually wash their hair).
YES on the guest list: Lady Gaga
Duh. Not only would it be thrilling to see Gaga's outfit and style for the soiree, but even when she is looking and acting like a freak, she manages to stay cool and put together. She would tear up the dance floor and it wouldn't be pretentious--it would just encourage the rest of the party to gyrate and act crazy, which is totally fun. And maybe at the end of the night she'd even slur out a ballad on piano while everyone else crashes. Everything is better with Gaga.
NO on the guest list: Courtney Love
Oh Courtney, the thing is, I DO want to party with you but I really can't trust that you're not going to sneak away into a corner, do a bunch of heroin, and cut a b*tch. I think you're fun (when you keep your clothes on) but I think having you at a party would guarantee that the cops would also show up at some point. Sorry, Love.
YES on the guest list: Daft Punk, The Knife, and other electronic superstars
These people are so mysterious and so fun--awesome light shows, amazing dance music, and yet, I hardly know them beyond their stage personas. How cool would it be to be playing beer pong with a de-helmeted member of Daft Punk? Answer: the coolest thing. Ever. Actually, even with the helmet. Yes, please.
NO on the guest list: Aerosmith
Aerosmith means drama--Steven Tyler would be in a back room popping pills and making out with a teenager, Joe Perry would be avidly complaining to a separate crowd about what a dick Tyler is, and the rest of the band would be hovering awkwardly in limbo, waiting for their friends to help them socialize. Aerosmith would also keep changing their minds about when they were leaving so you'd have to go through the goodbye process about a million times: "wow guys, I'm sad that you're leaving, thanks for everything but have a good night. We'll miss you! Bye!" 3 minutes later... "Oh... you're back? ...again?" It's just not worth the attentional demands.
So now I ask you, who would and wouldn't make your list?
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