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Melky Cabrera Asks Braves To 'Suck It,' Chipper Jones Resists, Negotiations Ongoing

Bison Messink
MLB
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Ongoing negotiations in Atlanta this week appear to be at an impass, after San Fransisco Giants' Melky Cabrera has made repeated requests that the Atlanta Braves "suck it." Braves third baseman Chipper Jones has gone on record stating that neither he, nor any of his Braves teammates have any intention to fulfill the request. What is yet unclear in the situation is whether or not the Cabrera might be able to proceed with making Jones and the Braves suck it, despite their resistence.

Melky Cabera suck itCabrera, who spent one lackluster season with the Braves in 2010, is having an MVP-caliber season with the Giants and is back in Atlanta this week for face-to-face negotiations with the Braves on the suck it issue.

It had appeared that the Braves would indeed "suck it" this week, as the Giants rolled over Atlanta in the first two games of a three game series. Cabrera has excelled in the two opening games, going 4-10 with a home run, a double and three RBIs. Meanwhile, Melky Cabrera repeatedly made a lewd chopping motion toward his genitals--the universal gesture that directs the opposing party to "suck it."

However, following Wednesday's game, Chipper Jones indicated that the Braves may not be willing to grant Cabrera his request.

melky cabrera suck it"That's Melky," Jones said of the "suck it" directive, "and that's why he's not here anymore. He got a little happy when (Gregor) Blanco hit the home run (in the 10th). It won't be forgotten."

If you read between the lines, Jones' message is clear: No, Melky, we will not, nor have we ever had any intention to, suck it.

We shouldn't have to wait long to see how, exactly, the negotiations play out. The Braves and Giants meet for the third and final game of the series today at noon. Cabrera, of course, will attempt to continue his hot streak and force the Braves to suck it, whether or not they are willing. The Braves, meanwhile, will try shut Cabrera down with power moves of their own. It is yet unclear which avenues the Braves will pursue to rebuff Cabrera's directives. The two most apparent means of recourse the Braves have available are to either 1.) get Cabrera out when he comes to the bat and win the game, or 2.) throw a pitch in his ear.

Stay tuned for more news, as we will be monitoring the situation closely.

--

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Bison Messink: UPDATE! Melky goes 2-for-3 with a triple in Atlanta, once again using his "lewd crotch chopping gesture" after the triple, but Braves win 3-2. Atlanta does not suck it.
July 19, 2012

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