If the Jersey Shore cast can play off being on a "reality" television show, than why couldn't they pretend to be at least a little happy for Snooki's engagement and baby news? On Thursday night's latest episode Snooki drops her bombshells, Roger and Jionni try to hit each other in the head and the girls throw a party for their close family and friends to celebrate the new apartment. The little arguments between Snooki and JWoww also foreshadow the bigger fights that are bound to happen soon.

|  Related: Snooki and JWoww talk about the new show|
Talk and share everything Snooki and JWoww! Join JerseyShoreOlogy! 

The girls invite the Jersey Shore crew over for some sauce and meatballs and immediately support Snooki's news.
"Wait a second, I'm a little upset about this." - Vinny
"Everyone knows you don’t even get a girl from the Jersey shore. A wife? A husband? That's out of control." - Vinny
"You think two years is long enough time to marry someone, and spend the rest of your days with?" - Vinny
"You know that's one person for the rest of your life." – Ronnie
"You know that's one penis for the rest of your life." – Vinny
"I love his penis." – Snooki
"You are hating on like the whole engagement." – Sammi
"Jionni can't afford that shit. The kid doesn't even have a job." – Vinny
"Did she buy it?" – Pauly D on Snooki's engagement ring.
"You guys are going to get divorced soon anyway." – Vinny

Oh, okay. Well, maybe not.

[Cricket]

"Awkward." – Ronnie
"Well, congratulations on your engagement!" – Pauly D
"Yeah, dig in. F-ck you all." - Snooki

"How long have you been with Jionni?" – Sammi
"Like, three months." – Vinny
"No. Almost two years." – Snooki

"I can't picture Snooki being tied down, unless its to a bedpost or something." – Pauly D

"This is what you could have had baby. I clean and work." – Vinny
"So does Jionni." – Snooki
"Where?" – Vinny
"On your vagina." – Ronnie

Oh hey, don't forget that she hasn't even told them that she's pregnant yet. OMFG, don't do it. DON'T DO IT.

Okay, do it. By writing, "By the way, I'm pregnant," on the cake.

"Hold on a second. Your knocked up?" – Pauly D

Okay, hold up. Vinny looks absolutely shocked and sad (because we all know he really likes Snooki), right? Wasn't this all staged? Didn't we all think that the baby news was already revealed to the public before they shot these scenes? Hmm. Vinny, those acting classes may be paying off.

"Oh my God, it looks like a little meatball." – Deena about the sonogram that Snooki pulled out from her cleavage.

"What the hell is going on? I feel like the only meatball I have now is the one that's left on my plate." - Deena

Okay, so clearly this surprise doesn't go over that well either. At least JWoww is being supportive in front of everyone.

"No more meatball days." – Deena
"Well, until it pops out." – Snooki
"When it pops out you gotta take care of it." – Pauly D
"You gotta take care of it! What are you talking about?" – JWoww

Never mind.

"Jenni, I know this. We've been talking about this. You're so annoying." – Snooki

 Poor JWoww.

"I thought you were going to be the one who has one first." - Deena
"Not after the shit I've been going through with her. She's miserable! Because of her I am petrified of having a kid." – JWoww
"That's real nice. Why don't you let her feel a little bit better?" – Vinny

Says the kid that basically just said she would be divorced from Jionni in three months.

Sammi (and sort of Deena) are the only ones that are basically supportive in the moment.

After the crew leaves, the girls watch a birthing video.
"Then they will insert the medication into your vagina…"
"I was watching a vagina—and I had no idea how far it stretches!" - Jenni

Later on the girls deal with that handyman Anthony, and find out he sometimes randomly has lollipops in his pocket.

"Leave a sexy message, bitches! Bye!"

Anthony (you know that creepy first handyman they had) is calling for his money. The girls don't pick up though. But then, he shows up. With their new handyman Brian fixing the mess he made right in front of him.

"I just think Anthony is really creepy because he wants his money [BURP. BURP.] but, he just made a mess of everything." – Snooki 

After that episode the girls are ready for their party. Jionni brings over food and a grill he has to put together. Roger eventually helps him out.

"I knew it was gonna be a little tough putting this grill together, but nothing's fitting right." – Jionni

SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS! Booze time.

"I have a tiny dick and I love it." – Roger
"My dad's right next to you!" – JWoww
"He knows I have a tiny penis! He knows!" – Roger
"I'm so deadly honest its ridiculous. I've had Chlamydia four times." -Roger
"He's right next to my dad! I have to pee." - JWoww
"It'll probably burn a little bit." – Roger

A drunk Roger is a fun Roger.

So, after that awful conversation, Jenni's dad decides to go sit on the balcony with Snooki's dad. They chat about how much the girls have matured over the past three years. (As JWoww and the crowd continue to be loud and drunk inside.)

As the party dies down, Snooki tries to get Jionni to go smush with her. He'd rather hang with Roger though.

"Usually when you are pregnant you just don't want anything to do with sex." – Snooki

Um…can't it be the other way around?

"When me and Jionni smush its not like sex. We're in love and it's very passionate. It's not like random rabid sex. Its like real sex." – Snooki

Meanwhile, Jenni's not feeling it and continues to shove off Roger in bed.

SumOlogy: Snooki gets an uncomfortable reaction from the Jersey Shore cast when she reveals her news and Roger has had Chlamydia four times.

Grade: B+

---

Follow on Ology: Stephanie Webber |  CelebsOlogy

Follow on Twitter: @rosewebber  |  @CelebsOlogy

Comments (0)

RELATED

Snooki & JWoww