Last week: Jenna went home anddddd not sure anyone was sad about it.
The chefs are in Hong Kong now. John and Nookie are teaming up to get rid of Nicole next. Wait, what happened to Nookie's alliance with Avery? The teams are Nookie and John vs. Nicole, Liz and Avery. Avery figures she can get on the girls' good side (and I hope she's right). "The Course" is mostly a foot race, as usual.
"Thanks to Nookie we were getting passed by senior citizen Chinese women. They were cruising my us to Enlightenment."
Did I mention I love John yet? Anyway, the girls have a huge lead because Nookie is slow as hell. They catch up to the girls at the first stop where they have to bundle hairy crabs, which sounds just awful. Nicole takes the lead for the girls and I have no idea why. She's afraid of the things!
"Nicole and I start at the same time and I pretty much open up a No. 10 can of whoopass on her."
True story. The guys finish first, obvs. Avery starts regretting choosing the girls' team. The guys take off and I notice John has his manpris on again. SWOON. The boys arrive first at the next stop and they have to make a shit-ton of dumplings.
"Nookie is not the man for stuffing these dumplings. His fingers are small sausages."
Once again, the girls arrive and Nicole insists on doing the dumplings as well. Come ON. You sucked at the first stop. What makes you think you can handle? Avery should have stepped in.
"Avery, want to grab us some brewskies?"
The boys are talking shit and I love Avery because she can take it. She's a chill girl. The girls do actually catch up, but the boys still finish the dumplings first. They're off to meet Cat and Curtis, two people who still play no real role in this show. Just sayin.
"I know the girls aren't far behind us, so I'm thinking shit, we're screwed."
Nah, they still win. Way to psych us out though, editing team. The chefs find out they are cooking for a man called the "Demon chef." And he's pretty much insane. Everyone is on their own and they get to eat the Demon Chef's food first. The "most valuable chef" can not be eliminated. The exceptional ingredient is that the boys get an hour with the sous chef of the restaurant.
"I'm scared."
During their meal, the chef is screaming and hitting on Avery at the same time. Very uncomfortable, but at least the food looks really cool.
"Only one of the ladies can put that all in your mouth?"
What a perv. Then they eat a can of dogfood and something called "Sex on the Beach," which is basically a semen-filled condom. Yum!
"It was cream-filled and everything."
Nookie and John spend time with the sous chef, and Nookie is definitely utilizing him more than John. I'm getting worried. Also, John takes the front of the house and looks pretty dashing in his suit.
As for the dishes, the only person who gets praise all-around is Avery. And she does, in fact, win! When the chefs deliberate about who to send home, Nicole is talking nonsense and John calls her out. John votes for Nicole. Nicole votes for John. Nookie votes for Nicole. And... Liz votes for Nicole! Wow. Phew! That was a close call.
Off to Argentina!
SumOlogy: Can't say I'm sad to see Nicole go. Final four!
Grade: B
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